In my last conversation with Ochuodho, a mason and a regular at our Villa Rosa Kibandaski, he left me with some profound words. At that time, I was more relieved than impressed at his view of life because for the first time, the conversation was not centered on politics. The thing with Ochuodho was that he believed that during his daily commute to work, a glance at the local dailies from the vendor at the bus stop was enough to make him a political commentator. Sometimes I would agree with his arguments because I really value(d) my peace or because I simply wanted to have lunch in peace. On this day, I arrived earlier than he did and tucked myself at a corner hoping that no one, especially Ochuodho, would see me. I was wrong, he came straight to where I was, said hi and sat to have his meal.
As soon as he sat down, he turned to me and asked why I never share anything about my family and before I could respond, I found myself playing therapist. “You know…Ishi Maisha yako vizuri juu kuna mtu kwa familia yenu anagoja kutajirika na matanga yako.” For a moment I looked at him with confusion and relief (as explained earlier). I was not sure what Ochuodho had seen in my future, but for a stranger to randomly tell me that there are some family members waiting to get rich from my burial proceedings, that was awkward. I turned to him and asked what he meant and all he said was “wewe ishi vizuri”! On this day, we quietly enjoyed our lunch and that was the last I saw of him.
Looking back, I wish I probed him further, maybe he needed someone to listen to him or he was warning of something, but at that time, I was not ready to listen to other people’s problems because I had a handful of mines. Ochuodho is that friend who for most of the time speaks to entertain but once, in a rare, yet necessary occasion will speak to inform and it will be profound. These kinds of people are rare because at the time you need them, they will show up and encourage you to live and live authentically. Now, I know authenticity has been questioned, but c’mon, we have to stand for something or else, we will fall for anything!
Thing is, we are often seeking validation from people who will only benefit from us when we die. And in this case, consider death as the end of something. It could be the end of your job, marriage, business or even when you lose yourself. There are people who will only be there until a certain benefit dies, yet we spend so much time trying to impress them, satisfy their endless demands and go above and beyond to make their lives better. However, if tables turned, they will be the first ones to show you their back.
It took me a while to actually realize that sometimes “people are things” or as they say in my mother tongue “andu ni indo” is not always true. Because it is not everyone you come through for will come through for you genuinely. Genuinely, that they expect nothing in return. Some will contribute for your funeral for validation and to feel like they did something for you. But when you were alive and well, these people were barely concerned about your life. After all, won’t they eat the food served at your funeral? As long as there is a certain benefit for someone, sometimes, people are NOT things!
Mine is to remind you that at the end of the day, know who is worth your time, effort, resources and most importantly, your presence. Because as long as something is alive, someone is benefiting from it and once something dies, someone is waiting to benefit from it!
Until Next Time,
TMV.
2 comments
Regrettably,Ochuodho was being factual or more real about life.See,death of anything is certain, even food itself,the feeling of satisfaction after a meal ends at Ruai sewage.sio……The earlier that we are all aware that birth of anything and it’s demise is part and parcel of life,the better for we to cope with it’s expected demise, remember the infamous ”niliwawon” it should be more a phrase, nothing more than that .
Alafu, Ochuodho in the streets is a substance.nice piece
I had no idea that you even read this. I appreciate the feedback! Thanks my brother.